Live Like We are Dying

Now listen, you who say, "Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money." Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow.  What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes.  Instead, you ought to say, "If it is the Lord's will, we will live and do this or that." As it is, you boast and brag. All such boasting is evil.  Anyone, then, who knows the good he ought to do and doesn't do it, sins. James 4.13-17

This verse has been on my heart since yesterday.  I found a quote a while ago and set it on my skype ID as my quote: "God, during my vapor what have You called me to do?"

This weekend was one of the best weekends I've had in a long time.  It was because I lived it with purpose.  I purposefully scheduled time with each of my girls and did things with them that I knew they loved.  Abby and I went and sat at a park with our sketch pads and just drew.  It was pretty cool.  She did a great charcoal picture of some flowers, while I doodled different elements of the park.

Hannah and I went to the driving range.  Granted, I really like to do this and Hannah has never done anything more than putt-putt, but she has asked me a lot about when we would go putt-putting again. So we got a loaner club from the driving range and hit a bucket full of balls.  She is now asking when we are gonna play golf again and that she wants her own "puck" (golf club) to play with.

Jen and I went out to a movie and then a nice dinner at Season's 52 (our favorite place).  It was a great dinner to catch up with my wife and see her heart again.  Many times in life you just get comfortable with someone and then you lose sight of their hearts.  It was wonderful to smile, cry and laugh together as we walk through this life.

While at dinner, I received a phone call from my dad that my uncle, who is 3 years older than me and more like my brother, had a stroke.  This sent my heart and mind into a tail spin.  He is only 39 and in good health.  This type of stroke usually happens to older people with high blood pressure.  He doesn't have either one of these.

This just serves as a reminder to me that I'm not guaranteed the next breath, much less tomorrow.  That is what today's passage tells us.  We do a lot of bragging and planning, but live like we are entitled to the next breath.  I live with the assumption that I will make it home from work to kiss my wife and girls and tell them once again, "I love you."  But I am not guaranteed the next moment, much less this evening.

With this morbid thought, we have one of two choices.  We can either let this settle in our hearts and cause us to live our lives paralyzed by fear emotionally, mentally, spiritually, and physically or we can use it to motivate us to live our lives, every moment, on purpose - without regret.  I choose this day, this moment, right now to live without regret.  I choose to take my wisp of a vapor, called life, and use it bring glory to God my Father in Heaven to make sure that everyone who comes in touch with me right now knows I and God love them tremendously.

Let me close by allowing my inner-red-neck to come out.  Take a look at the lyrics to this Tim McGraw song entitled, Live Like You Were Dying:

Verse 1
He said I was in my early forties, with a lot of life before me
And one moment came that stopped me on a dime
I spent most of the next days, looking at the x-rays
Talking bout' the options and talking bout' sweet times.
I asked him when it sank in, that this might really be the real end
How's it hit 'cha when you get that kind of news?
Man what did ya do?
He said

Chorus
I went skydiving
I went rocky mountain climbing
I went two point seven seconds on a bull named Fu Man Chu
And I loved deeper
And I spoke sweeter
And I gave forgiveness I'd been denyin'
And he said some day I hope you get the chance
To live like you were dyin'

Verse 2
He said I was finally the husband, that most the time I wasn't
And I became a friend, a friend would like to have
And all of a sudden goin' fishin, wasn't such an imposition
And I went three times that year I lost my dad
Well I finally read the good book, and I took a good long hard look
At what I'd do if I could do it all again
And then

Bridge
Like tomorrow was the end
And ya got eternity to think about what to do with it
What should you do with it
What can I do with it
What would I do with it

Join me in living like we are dying.  NO REGRETS!!! Take a moment and tell those closest to you that you love them.  Speak kindly today to those you come in contact with. Forgive those who have hurt you. Don't waste another moment...seize them with joy and purpose.

The Other Side - Part 2

Text: Mark 4:35-41

Traveling is fun and exciting.  You have the anticipation of the trip and what it will be like.  You have the preparation of packing and planning.  Then comes the trip itself.  At each of these stages comes great joy and marvelous apprehension.  The fear of the unknown and the unexpected can creep in and cause paralysis to point of cancellation for some of us, but most of us push through or don't even recognize our fear and get in the car, plane, train, or boat and head out for the great unknown.

What helps many of us in preparating is to study the area we are going to and the journey that will take us there.  We map it all out.  We plan our stops around scenic points or favorite restaurants.  We are going to make the journey part of the trip.  We enjoy getting there as much as being there.

When God calls us to go to the "other side" however, we can't exactly plan our trip like this.  In some cases we don't know where the "other side" really is or how we are going to get there, we just know that God has called us to go.  In other cases we know full well where there is and we don't like the idea of going or the path that getting there is going to take.

Look at this:
"That day when evening came, he said to his disciples, 'Let us go over to the other side.' Leaving the crowd behind, they took him along, just as he was, in the boat. There were also other boats with him.  A furious squall came up, and the waves broke over the boat, so that it was nearly swamped.  Jesus was in the stern, sleeping on a cushion.  The disciples woke him and said to him, 'Teacher, don't you care if we drown?'
"He got up, rebuked the wind and said to the waves, 'Quiet! Be still!' Then the wind died down and it was completely calm.
"He said to his disciples, 'Why are you so afraid? Do you still have no faith?'
"They were terrified and asked each other, 'Who is this? Even the wind and the waves obey him!'" Mark 4:35-41 (NIV)

These guys were fisherman, many of them.  They grew up fishing on the Sea of Galilee.  They knew these storms and many of them had been caught in one at one point or other.

They also "knew" Jesus, or so they thought.  They had seen him cast out demons and heal the sick.  They had already heard His teachings, yet they still didn't comprehend or believe. This leads to the age old question:
Is believing seeing or seeing believing?

Let me pause here for a moment, Jesus was in the boat with them.  He was at peace because He knew that it wasn't His time yet.  If Jesus is in your boat and your life is swamped - if you feel like life is out of control and you are following God and His plan to go the other side - then rest assured that you are going to make it.  See Jesus wasn't sent to die in a boat, He was destined to die on a cross.  In our lives Jesus is risen, never to die again.  If He is with us then we won't sink or capsize or drown.  He will see to it that we make it to the "other side".

Some times the journey isn't an easy sail across the lake.  It isn't tiptoeing through the tulips.  It isn't a nice drive across town.  It is fraught with many perils and dangers.  It is filled with spirit crushing events. See our enemy, Satan, wants to demoralize us before we ever get there.  He doesn't want us to make it there alive, physically, emotionally, mentally or spiritually.  He will do whatever it takes to stop us from making it to the other side whole and intact.

Here comes the encouragement for all of us, "He got up, rebuked the wind and said to the waves, 'Quiet! Be still!' Then the wind died down and it was completely calm." Mark 4.39

"Greater is He who is in us than he who is in the world." 1 John 4.4

Our Savior and Lord, the One who is planning and leading this trip to the "other side", is greater than the one opposing us. We will make the trip to the other side.  We will see God show up in an amazing way and do something that only He can do.  We will see the glory of the Father revealed in and through us as we make this journey to the "other side".

Don't let fear of the unknown paralyze you from making the trip to the "other side" this year.  Don't let the storms of life cause you to lose heart and go back.  Don't let life drowned out the passion and desire to live for God totally and completely.  Don't stop making the journey to the "other side" because God has a task for you.  He has a role for you to play.  He has Himself to reveal to the people and lands of the "other side" and He wants to do it through you.

Prayer: Lord, would you please help me! I am drowning in life.  I am overwhelmed to the point of death with fear and trembling.  I feel like I'm going under for the last time, but I know the truth in my head that You are with me.  I know the reality is that You are more powerful, help me to live it out and believe it in my heart.  Please help me to not be so afraid and to walk in faith.  I want to see You glorified and magnified among the people who live on the "other side". Amen.

The Other Side - part 1

The Other Side - part 1
Mark 4.35-41

The other side is a scary place. It is full of unknowns and uncertainties. It remains a mystery as long as it remains the other side. It remains "there" instead of "here". But when we travel to the other side we find some thing amazing happens in us and through us.

Many times in life we are content to stay right where we are - comfortable - unchallenged - familiar - unmoved. We don't like the feeling that the unknown brings. We don't like being outside of our comfort zones. We don't travel outside of our usual circles. We don't wander too far from the sidewalk. But is this what we have been called to do? Is this how Christ lived? Is this what He saved us for?

The "other side of the lake" (Mark 4.35) or the Sea of Galilee was Gentile territory. It was a foreign place to the disciples. They wouldn't have traveled there because it was outside of their culture. It was considered unclean. It was so far from their beliefs that they would never have gone there. Yet Jesus tells His disciples, "Let's go to the other side of the lake."

Jesus was making a point in this statement. He never just says something to say something. He lived His entire life with purpose - on purpose. He was going to take the gospel to the Gentiles. He was going to expose His followers to new territory. He was going to show them the BIG picture. He was the Savior of the Jews and the Gentiles. He was living out John 3:16 - for God so loved the world. 

Many times we get stuck on our side of the world. We get comfortable and complacent. We get hung up on the minors. We don't go to the people unlike us simple because they aren't like us. They don't live like us - believe like us - talk like us - look like us. If God wants to reach them then He will send some one like them to them. 

WRONG!

The people on the other side don't need our pity or our things. They don't require our money or possessions. They don't request our arrogance or service. They need our lives.

Jesus is telling us that He is for ALL people and He is sending us to ALL people. 

Where is the other side in your life? Who are the people that live on the other side? Will you be the one to get in the boat with Jesus and go to them? Will you make there here?

Prayer: Lord you asked Your disciples to go with You to the other side, and now You are asking me. Give me the courage to get in the boat, the love to stay in the boat and the strength to see it through. Help me to see others as You see them. Help me to love others as you love them. Help me to go to the other side with You and share Your live an hope with them. 

I am who I am because of You!

Have you ever wondered why you are the way you are?  Heritage?  Genetic predisposition? Random selection?

When I entered college I began a journey to understand what is what that I believed and why I believed it.  I wanted to have my own faith.  I grew up in the church with some amazing parents who always pointed me back to God and His Word.  But I wanted to know why these things that I had heard all of my life were true.  I wanted to understand who I was and why I was.

I found during this time an amazing Savior who loved me just the way I was - messed up and not perfect.  I found a best-friend who was always there to listen to me moan and groan about life and celebrate with me when something great happened.  I began to understand that I was never alone, even in the darkness of my dorm room.  I looked around me at the north Georgia mountains and saw the Creator of this wondrous creation.

These are the same things that Paul begins telling the church at Rome.  Remember that he is writing to believers, Jews and Gentiles alike.  He is writing to the church - that includes even those of us who are believers today.  Check out these passages from Romans 1:

"The sacred writings contain preliminary reports by the prophets on God's Son.  His descent from David roots him in history; his unique identity as Son of God was shown by the Spirit when Jesus was raised from the dead, setting him apart as the Messiah, our Master.  Through him we received both the generous gift of his life and the urgent task of passing it on to others who receive it by entering into obedient trust in Jesus.  You are who you are through this gift and call of Jesus Christ!" (Romans 1.2-7 MSG)

Did you catch all of that?  Jesus is who He is because of His Father in heaven and because of His fathers here on earth.  We are who we are because of our fathers here on earth and our Father in heaven.  My dad is a great man - not perfect by any stretch.  He loved me the best way that he knew how, and when I realized that it set me free.

God, my Father in heaven, loves me as well, but is more than a great man.  He is the Creator of great men.  He is the Author and Perfecter of faith.  He is the main reason that I am who I am.  Did you also see this part - "Through him"?  It is through Jesus Christ, all that He is, was and is to be, that we receive salvation.  It isn't dependent on my actions, or lack thereof.  I am who I am because of the generous gift of Jesus and the call that He has put on my life to tell others about Him.

As Christians, or followers of Christ, we are who we are because of Jesus - not because we follow a certain set of laws, or attend a certain church, or hold to a strong belief that has been passed down from generation to generation.  We are who we are because of Jesus and what He did on the cross.  I am who I am ALL and ONLY because of Jesus.

"You are the choices that you make" is a quote that I heard a while ago and use quite frequently when talking with students and my girls.  So today I choose Jesus.  Today I choose to submit my will to Him.  Today I choose to rest in the generous gift through Him and find myself immersed in who He is.  Today I give You all of me for all of You.

Will you join me?

Run Away

As a little boy I remember, and my parents remind me, that I wanted to run away from home.  I packed up everything I had (toys, candy, etc.) and grabbed my knee pads and skate board.  I wrote a note to my family telling them good bye and leaving certain treasures to my mom and sister.  Dad got nothing because I was made at him.  Then I did the unthinkable, when running away from home, I hand delivered the note to my father.  He read it, while I stood by his bed, and then proceeded to ask me where I was going.  I told him that I didn't know but that I wanted to be away from him.  He offered to take me to Grandma's or to my friend's house.  I refused.  After his many offers of rides to places, I decided to stay because I couldn't get rid of him.

Looking back now, I am thankful for the presence of my Dad.  He wasn't going to leave me or just let me leave his presence.  I didn't really like him at that point, but I was glad that he was with me.

This morning I was thinking about yesterday's reading from Romans 8 and had a new insight into Psalms 139.  Have you ever had one of those days like I describe above, but it was more with God.  Things in life aren't going according to the plan that you thought or you are getting tired of getting kicked in the gut.  So, you go to God and tell Him that you are tired of it all.  You are tired of trying to live life according to His plan.  You tell him that it is time for Him to step in and help out.  Maybe, you haven't, but you will one day.

Check this out this passage from Psalms 139.1-12 (MSG):

God, investigate my life; got all the facts firsthand.  I'm an open book to you; even from a distance, you know what I'm thinking.

 I've been at that distance from God.  It is me who moved.  I didn't want to be in His presence because I didn't like how things were going.  I was tired of hearing people tell me that "God has something special for you".  The Christian-eeze was just way too much for, but the cool thing--God knew what I was thinking even in those moments.

You know when I leave and when I get back; I'm never out of your sight.  You know everything I'm going to say before I start the first sentence.  I look behind me and you're there, then up ahead and you're there, too--your reassuring presence, coming and going.  This is too much, too wonderful--I can't take it all in!

This too much for me.  God is with me everywhere.  No matter where I turn, even if it is away from Him, He is still there.  If I tell God to stay because I don't like Him (like I did my dad that night), He is still there when I turn around to walk away (like my dad was when I turned to walk away).

This kind of love is too much for me!  It is too wonderful!  I can't even begin to fathom this!  But wait, there is more!!!

Is there anyplace I can go to avoid your Spirit? to be out of your sight?

I know that I've asked that question and even tried this with God.  I don't want like how things are going or what You are doing--or what You aren't doing--I don't like You.  Where can I go to get away from You?

If I climb to the sky, you're there!  If I go underground, you're there!  If I flew on morning's wings to the far western horizon, You'd find me in a minute--you're already there waiting!

Did you catch that?  He is already there waiting for us.  Where we think that we can escape Him, He is already there waiting for us--waiting for us.  Really?!?  Why?  Because of love--because He is love!

Then I said to myself, "Oh, he even sees me in the dark!  At night I'm immersed in the light!"  It's a fact: darkness isn't dark to you;  night and day, darkness and light, they're all the same to you.

The darkest moments of my life--the nights that lay awake and worry.  The days that I can't focus. The times where I feel that I can't go on.  Those moments are as light to God.  What a message of hope!

This week I had some pretty dark moments.  I was pretty upset with God.  I was ready to throw in the towel and walk away.  But God didn't let me.  He never left me.  I am grateful for His presence.

Thanks Dad for teaching me this lesson as a boy.  Thanks Daddy (Abba) for continuing to teach me this lesson as a man.

Your thoughts--how rare, how beautiful!  God, I'll never comprehend them!  I couldn't even begin to count them--any more that I could count the sand of the sea.  Oh, let me rise in the morning and live always with you! (Psalms 139.17-18 MSG)

Prayer:
Thank you Lord, for never leaving me.  Thank you for being with me in my darkest moments.  Thank you for being with me even when I don't want to be with You.  Thank you for Your word and the truth they remind my heart of.  Thank you for showing Yourself to me today.  May I rise this morning and from this present darkness in my life and live always with You.  Amen.

Separation Anxiety

"I don't feel loved!"
"I don't deserve to be loved!"
"Why would anyone love me?"

These are questions that race through my mind in moments like these.  I don't understand why anyone, especially God, would love me.  With the day that I had yesterday, and then looking back over the past 12 years, I see many failures and mess-ups.  I see many things that I wish I could go back and redo.  Remember having do-overs in elementary school PE?  Those were so great.  When you messed up  you could scream "DO OVER!!!!" and every one reset and you could try again.

The stress and pressures of life, marriage, parenting, finances, professional, and personal are overwhelming.  As a Christian, we think that we are supposed to be immune to these things, at least I do.  I have a mixed up perception of what life as a follower of Christ should be.  As a father I want the best for my girls.  I want them to have everything they need and most of what they want.  I then think that as God's child it entitles me to have all of my wants and most of needs.  When in reality what really matters?

Coming home after a long day and having my family come running to me, Jen included, screaming, "DADDY!!!" and throwing their arms around and kissing me - this is what I live for.  Life seems to come into focus better when we realize that we are loved.  Check out this passage that was next in line for reading today.  It is taken from Romans 8.31-39 (MSG):

So, what do you think?  With God on our side like this, how can we lose?  If God didn't hesitate to put everything on the line for us, embracing our condition and exposing himself to the worst by sending his own Son, is there anything else he wouldn't gladly and freely do for us?

Did you catch that?  "...gladly and freely..."  God will gladly and freely do anything for us.  Just look at His track record.  When has He failed you in the past?  I know that we think that He has failed us, but really?  Take a long hard look.  Has God ever let you down?  He might have answered it differently than you thought.  He might have taken a bit longer to answer than you thought, or really wanted.  But has He ever let you down?

And who would dare tangle with God by messing with one of God's chosen?  Who would dare even point a finger?

Take a break and notice this.  Who are they messing with?  God!  People knew growing up not to mess with my sister because, "That is Ryan's sister.  Don't mess with her."  I wasn't a bully but I was 6' 1" in the 9th grade, and she was only in the 4th grade at that time.  God is the same way.  He is our defender.  Thank you Lord.

The One who died for us--who was raised to life for us!--is in the presence of God at this very moment sticking up for us.  Do you think that anyone is going to be able to drive a wedge between us and Christ's love for us?  There is no way!  Not trouble, not hard times, not hatred, not hunger, not homelessness, not bullying threats, not backstabbing, not even the worst sins listed in Scripture:

Look back at yesterday's scripture: He (the Holy Spirit) keeps us present before God.  Now today we see that Christ is in the presence of God, the Father, sticking up for us.  He is our BIG Brother.  He is effectively intervening on our behalf.

None of this fazes us because Jesus loves us.  I'm absolutely convinced that nothing--nothing living or dead, angelic or demonic, today or tomorrow, high or low, thinkable or unthinkable--absolutely nothing can get between us and God's love because of the way that Jesus our Master has embraced us.

What a great passage!  Nothing will shut God's love off to us.  Even we feel unlovable or unloved, God hasn't stopped loving us.  We might have something in the way of our experiencing it or living in it, but God hasn't stopped loving. I am thankful that in my time of feeling unlovable, I can know that I am loved.  In the moments when I choose to not live according to the truth of God's love, I am still loved.

An old counselor of ours had this quote on his desk:

"Truth is what God says no matter how I feel."

Thank God for this truth today.

Lord, right now I don't feel Your love.  I doubt that You are even for me at times.  Please break through my wall of defenses.  Please flood my heart, mind and life with the truth of Your word.  Thank You for continually pursuing me with Your love.  I am glad that Your love isn't dependent on my feelings or actions.  Reveal Your love to me today in a real way--a way that I can't explain but You.  Thank you for Your love.  Amen!

PS. I would love to know how is keeping up and what you think.  Please leave me comments if you want to hear a certain topic or anything.

Joyful anticipation or Frustrated exhaustion

"I am so tired of this.  How long must we wait?"  This is the sentiment that comes too frequently to my own mind and heart.  The apostle Paul, I'm sure, felt the same way.  I know that the church in Rome felt that way.  Paul wrote about these feelings for frustration and exhaustion in Romans 8.18-28.

We are desperately waiting - waiting for something more.  We long for something better.  We know that things aren't the way that they should be.  We know that we aren't the way we should be.  Check out this passage:

That's why I don't think there's any comparison between the present hard times and the coming good times.  The created world itself can hardly wait for what's coming next.  Everything in creation is being more or less held back.  God reins it in until both creation and all the creatures are ready and can be released at the same moment into the glorious times ahead.  Meanwhile, the joyful anticipation deepens.

"Joyful anticipation"?  Really?  I know that I was joyfully anticipating the birth of my two daughters.  The wait was tiresome at times.  I remember that the closer we got to the 40 weeks the more we were ready to have them here.  But the anticipation of this broken world being made complete is, many times, anything but joyful.  It is sometimes the most painful experience of life.

We live in a broken and fallen world.  The problem is that we expect things to be different, but when we get kicked in the teeth or punched in the gut by reality, we remember that we are broken, those around us are broken, and the world is broken.  We aren't who we were created to be.  This isn't the way that God planned it all to go.  Check out how it continues:

All around us we observe a pregnant creation.  The difficult times of pain throughout the world are simply birth pangs.  But it's not only around us; it's within us.

Did you catch that?  It's not only around us; it's within us.  Within us!

The Spirit of God is arousing us within.  We're also feeling the birth pangs. These sterile and barren bodies of ours are yearning for full deliverance.  That is why waiting does not diminish us, any more than waiting diminishes a pregnant mother.  We are enlarged in the waiting.  We, of course, don't see what is enlarging us.  But the longer we wait, the larger we become, and the more joyful our expectancy.

There is that phrase again, "the more joyful our expectancy."  What the heck?  Really?  Was Job joyful in his expectancy?  Was Joseph joyful in his anticipation of his dream?  Was Jesus joyful in His expectancy of resurrection?  Was Peter joyful in his expectancy of "on this rock I will build my church"?  We are human and many times we put on ourselves these expectations of being Super Human.  We want to be able to leap tall buildings in a single bound.  We want to be more powerful than a speeding locomotive.  We want to be faster than a speeding bullet.  But we aren't.  We are human.  We are broken!

The next verses of this passage are where I find myself most days.  It is where hope is restored when I have no hope.  When I find myself at the bottom of a dark cistern I know that my disappointment and frustration is being communicated to God by God.

Meanwhile, the moment we get tired in the waiting, God's Spirit is right alongside helping us along.  If we don't know how or what to pray, it doesn't matter.  He does our praying in and for us, making prayer out of our wordless sighs, our aching groans.  He knows us far better than we know ourselves, knows our pregnant condition, and keeps us present before God.  That's why we can be so sure that every detail in our lives of love for God is worked into something good.

This is where I find myself more often than not - wordless sighs and aching groans.  Frustration at every turn.  Moments, brief as they are, of relief, but mostly struggle after struggle.  I know that I am saved and that I have the Holy Spirit living in me.  I know that God loves me, but the reality of life is very contrary to that knowledge.  I hope that the Holy Spirit is keeping me present before God because I'm not sure that at times I want to be, or even deserve, in His presence.


If you feel this way, join me in voicing this prayer.  It's okay to let your heart cry and your eyes weep.  It's okay to let your heart break for the desire of our God.  It's to not be Super Human.  Just be real before God and He will be real before you.

-Prayer-
God, I can't do this any more.  I have been trying to live for You, but I have failed at every turn.  I come and bring my broken life and broken hopes and broken dreams to You.  I am not who I, much You, want me to be.  I am tired and frustrated.  I am need of rest.  You say in Your Word, "Come to me all who are weary and heavy laden and I will give you rest."  I am in desperate need of rest and hope.  I need Your hope.  Scratch that request.  I need You in my life.  I need You to reveal Yourself in a real way in my life.  I NEED YOU!!!